THE HONEY THAT TASTES SWEET

So, it was like 11:17, and I decided to write something. It's been long since I've visited my blog. I was very busy to check it out. And look how dull it is now. I'm currently smiling to myself, that my last entry was last September 2012. It's time that I remembered I have a blog waiting for me to write an entry. Like my blog says to me, "Please write an entry, please do so!". So here I am hearing my blog's grieving plea.

WHAT HAPPENED TODAY..

Today, was a so-so. Just because it is a holiday, it felt like a weekend to me. My weekend routine was to do more coding for the system of my thesis. Study more codes. And since it was a Friday, I attended the youth gathering in Victory Greenhills. 

The preaching tonight hit me. As in, big time. I wouldn't be too excited to write, if it weren't for that highlight. I realized, that it wasn't just the usual Friday that I was experiencing, that I would have experienced. It made me realize a lot of things.

First, is that though I am a Christian for a long time(for twelve years and still counting), I wasn't able to really comprehend what my relationship with God should be. I've been planting on the wrong kind of soil that I, myself had chosen for myself. Yes, I was gravely wrong for that it is not me that chose God. But it is God who chose me, of all students in my campus, of all the teenagers in this country, of all the sinners of this world. People who knew me in the past, may know that I'm very prideful. Not that I am really boastful, but they find me like that maybe because I was kind of liking that I do everything my way, being the leader type. Today, it is clear that I have been chosen. That I should be dependent on Him alone, and it is not by my good works and my effort that he loves me. But it is by His grace that I am here now, writing this.

Second, I learned that my mission should be very much followed up. I know, I have been busy with so many things, like school stuff and such. Many things have come up. The thesis. The pressures of graduating next year. The reality of life after that. The Mavens(school's glee club). The school paper, for which I have been positioned as Editor-in-Chief. I've been too busy. Doing things. But I haven't forgotten my mission. Yesterday, Thursday, I was sharing 121 to my classmate. It so happened that it came as 122 because another classmate of ours was there to listen, and I've seen the opportunity to share to the both of them even if I was not very ready to do so. It was really fulfilling that time even if I had to sacrifice eating lunch just to meet them up. But it's alright, I did not feel hungry the whole time because I was so happy that I was sharing God's word and my testimony to them as a Christian. Also, I wasn't very open to the responsibility of being editor-in-chief of the school paper. At first, I was really hesitant to get hold of the position, but when I was there at the meeting, it came to me that God is giving me a lot of responsibilities to serve him well. I know that God is giving me opportunities to make Lifebox possible in our campus. And being in the school paper, being the leader of the school paper may mean a lot of chances to make it happen. I could freely advertise anything, as the editor-in-chief, so that's what I've been thinking. I know that everything falls into place perfectly when God permits it. It is just up to me to grab or dismantle those opportunities and responsibilities He has given me to expand His kingdom. I know they are pretty big, and I'll be busier than ever but I know my God will give me the strength to uphold these things for His glory. 

Third, I realized what I should do. It may have come to me like I've been hit with that message tonight. But it is really up to me to decide on which I would do about it. Yes, I am a Christian. And I want to others to know about my relationship with Christ. 

       There is a difference between having a rational judgment that honey is sweet and having a sense of its sweetness.  A man may have the former that knows not how honey tastes; but a man cannot have the latter unless he has an idea of the taste of honey in his mind.  (Jonathan Edwards, A Divine and Supernatural Light)

I can tell others about my relationship with Christ, I could testify to them what I was and what I've become because of Him. But until they are not having that personal encounter that I have with Him right now, they would not know what it is like in God's presence. It is not enough that we have known Him. How will they taste the honey if all we do is to tell them how sweet it is? How will they find out if it is really sweet? It is until they have tasted it by themselves. How great it is to have a God like Him. We have to really show them great his love for us that it is by His grace that he first loved us and found us like a wretched and lost sheep that we have this personal encounter with Jesus. I know I am blessed that I was chosen to be the blessing to others by sharing my encounter with Jesus.

Sometimes, being reminded is not about getting criticisms. It's about taking those criticisms and taking them as good advises.

That's all. 

Yours sincerely, 

Author Known 

Thoughts On BLUE LIKE JAZZ

"I never liked jazz music because jazz music doesn't resolve. I used to not like God because God didn't resolve."

In all possible sense, I find this film really moving. I don't know, but it just cut through what I am today. The realization of what life is, doesn't matter in the slightest ways. 

What is "REASON"?

The film started awkwardly, as I find it because you know the typical films as I have watched. It is divided it into four sections where the story was exclaimed perfectly. 

SETTING. CONFLICT. CLIMAX. RESOLUTION.

Setting. Like in the process of writing a summary, I find this better to explain my point of view. Setting, this is where the story starts, when and where it happened. It's plainly the introduction of the whole story. In Blue Like Jazz, we find the protagonist, Don, upbringing his church life and readying himself to go to college. 

Conflict. This is where Don's whole world goes upside down left and right all over. The thing is that, his dad, who likes jazz, paid for his college in Portland(Reed College). But he tried to refuse this offer since he has a scholarship from doing church work. When he finds out that his mother is committing adultery with the youth pastor, he actually takes the opportunity to escape this problematic life he is in. 

Climax. In Reed, he found out how worldly life works. He met this super perfect girl(Penny) who never shared interest in him. He got his freedom. But is he really free? He finds himself doing things he never did as a Christian. He just wanted to escape. He became friends with a lesbo and an atheist, he also tried drinking. So in short, he was really opened to the world and its desires. And he was embracing it so easily.

Resolution. He finds himself lost. But then, he realized things after he attended an atheist book review, DOES GOD EXIST. He tried to ask a question to a writer, something like "how do you find meaning?" (as far as I remember). Where the writer told him to find a dictionary to find meaning. He then, realized things he was doing. Like yeah, I wouldn't want to spoil the whole movie to you( haha :)) ). 

MY REALIZATION.

One thing stuck in my mind:

"Sometimes you have to watch somebody love something before you can love it yourself."

Two things. Is that something for the better or for the worst. We always have a choice. We always have to make the right choice. To choose what to believe in. 

"I never liked jazz music because jazz music doesn't resolve. I used to not like God because God didn't resolve."

God didn't resolve? I don't see how God resolves my problems but I know, escaping and interfering with His plan ruins the better ending we might have. 

 "Fear isn't only a guide to keep us safe; it's also a manipulative emotion that can trick us into living a boring life."

So let go of the fear, and just stand firm with God.

Seriously Thinking,

Author Known :))

The Failing Process

The irrationality of a person depends upon a situation and how he reacts on it. This irrationality is what often leads to mistakes, failures, and downfalls at most. The instinctive method depends on your stimuli. 

When we fail, we learn. But when we trip on the same rock for the same reason for many times, that's what we call stupidity. If you don't learn the second time or the worst nth time, from falling, it means that you didn't fall hard enough. You weren't drenched in the pain that you were supposed to. That's why you keep committing the same mistake. 

I don't like failing. It's like life is rejecting my innermost desire to live in this world. That's what I hate the most. The only thing I fear. Because, I am afraid of getting hurt. My threshold of pain isn't that acceptable as you may know. I am weak. I am emotional. I think there's nothing wrong being like that, because I am a human. FLAWED AT IT'S PERFECT IMPERFECTION. 

I don't go into battles I can't win. That's what I tell myself. Being strong doesn't require much. It's all in the mind. 

The reason why I became like this. 

I was always compared with my younger brother. We're like the mortal competitors on a gladiator arena. Whereas, I am the one losing because no one likes me. I was the bad-looking, no-tune in singing, stick drawing, dumb. My philosophy came from this. That, in order for me to win the battle, I don't need to counterattack his techniques. I don't have to fight within the limits I know I won't succeed. I just have to find ways I am good at. So that he will never imagine how weak I am even if I am. 

I was always the good. I never grew to be better. Because I think that was the only reason I can always treat my brother well. To be not as good at him within things I know he will be better with. He's talented. He improves because he doesn't know how better I'll be when I get serious in this battle. Sometimes, in life, you don't need to know everything. So that you never have to be hurt. I'm also talented, obviously, we're from the same genes, right? But I chose to be a wallflower. Never to be heard or seen. Just in the background, supporting. 

In life, you need to sacrifice things to make others happy. And I chose giving up those things to make my life miserable, haha joke! I chose to be the vine that holds the leaves together. I realized that it's kind of awkward to use these metaphors I know I am using profoundly. Because when you are the vine, you make others stay together. As for the leaves I am keeping, I hope you are making your part of staying within my parameters. 

I don't know people who steps on the failing process because I'm not buying them.

Mentally Irrational,

Author Known :))

SALT OF THE EARTH

IS TASTELESS FOOD EATEN WITHOUT SALT, OR IS THERE FLAVOR IN THE WHITE OF AN EGG? [Job 6:6]

Let's put it this way. Would you rather eat salt or the white of an egg? 

Tasteless -- without flavor; useless

You are the salt of the earth. But if the salt loses its saltiness, how can it be made salty again? It is no longer good for anything, except to be thrown out and trampled by men. [Matthew 5:13]

We are the salt of the earth, but do you really think you are remaining salty?


SALT PURIFIES. Acts and words. Blameless. Christ-like. Nowadays, sometimes we are carried by the rhythm of the world. It depends on how you purify yourself from abstaining to go with the flow.

SALT HEALS. They say salt heals, which is truly correct, as far as I can remember it has antiseptic effects when we put it into wounds. It hurts when we put some salt to our wounds, it is because the longer we endure the pain, the faster we heal. Sinning makes us un-salty. It makes us useless. When we are corrected or when we have criticisms, we don't actually accept them for a matter of seconds. It breaks us apart when we have them. But when we learn to accept them, it makes us better. 


SALT PRESERVES. In our History class, when I was in junior year, I learned that Egyptians used natron(salt) to preserve the mummies. To preserve the dead. The only difference is that, we live to be preserved. Preserving our outlook with life. Preserving the foundations we have in order to grow better in Christ.


SALT INTENSIFIES HEAT. In cooking pasta, I always try to figure out why my mom puts salt while boiling it. Now I know!! Lol, it intensifies the heat. When we are with fellow salts of the earth, we intensify the heat that we have. We burn for the great cause God has planned for us. 

Remaining salty is the hardest part of being a Christian. It doesn't mean that if we are salty enough that we have these characteristics, we have to stay in the salt shaker. We have to show and declare to the world that we are out of the salt shaker, to step out and let others know that our God through being salt of the earth.


Thinking Still,
Author Known

AM I A REAL FRIEND?

What is FRIENDSHIP? It is a relationship between two people who hold mutual affection for each other. They say, it is friendship when a person has the tendency to desire what is best for the other, when you share honesty, when you enjoy each other's company, and when you have trust with each other. 

Friends and acquaintances are often reciprocated as the same continuum. You'll only know the difference, when these acquaintances are really friends. Here, we could detest who are really real and those who are fake. 

To me, friendship means having mistakes and flaws without getting any judgement. 

HOW TO CHOOSE FRIENDS

Righteous. Good examples. Godly counsels. Not bad influences. Never lead you astray. Someone who will guide you to the right direction. Someone who will always remind you of the real purpose of your life, which is to serve God and live according to His will. [Proverbs 12:26] 

Wise. Someone who seeks wisdom and not knowledge. Most of all, not a fool. Knowledge is easy to understand, wisdom is not. Knowledge is found, wisdom is searched and delved. For wisdom is built within the strong foundation of knowledge, it is the opposite of folly. What foolishness brings us is senselessness. And it isn't in the path of understanding. A friend teaches you what is right and never of what is wrong. [Proverbs 13:20; 14:6,7]

To sum it all up, we need BI's. Not the typical meaning of Bad Influence as you may know and say, but Best Influence. Someone who is not subjected to anger, never wrathful, and never a bad company. For bad company ruins good morals. [1 Corinthians 15:33]

Maybe after reading this section of my blog, you may think "I'm doomed, friends are hard to find. I'm forever alone." The stronger the realization of this, the higher your standards will be. People are not made perfect. We may not find all those qualities. It is because we are not looking. And where should we start looking? It is in ourselves. 

IMPORTANCE OF FRIENDSHIP

We fail when we have no guidance. But with friends who are giving you advice, you will find safety. When we listen to advice, we gain wisdom. When we gain wisdom and apply it in our lives, we are wise. 

Iron sharpens iron, and one man sharpens another. When we find true friends, we become equal. We find better judgement and understanding. Friends lead us to the path God wants us to be. A friend desires what is better for his friend. A friend looks out for his friend. 

Am I a real friend?

Sincerely Asking, 
Author Known 

WHAT CAME MY WAY

I don't know how others could relate to this but I know somehow it's just by faith that I am writing now. It's has been a while since I last blogged. And I know it's kinda odd for me to write in this time. But I just want you to know how I feel now. 

A year ago: I felt my life has no direction. I'm just going with the flow of whom I am with and with the environment they are introducing to me. I really embraced that nature since. I never thought about what's right or wrong. I just know that with all these things that I have, I find happiness.

Now: I feel like my life has purpose. I'm going against the flow of the world. Though I am trying and struggling, I know God is with me, with whatever I do. Process. It takes time. It's not just in a snap or blink that I changed. Things that are easy to get, easily fly away. And I think a strong foundation is what I am trying to build now. It's such a miracle that I found God's grace pouring out on me. 

A year ago: I was afraid to stand up for my faith. Peer. Pressure. I was an introvert. Everybody knows that. I don't stand up or even express what I feel. I felt intimidated with other people's choices. I was an outcast. I don't play the game. 

Now: Look at me. I don't know how God has changed me. I may not really know I am changing bit by bit everyday. But I can see how people see in me. I am not the introvert type (well, maybe you'll find me like that sometimes, but not as often as before). I feel secure of how I could express and step out with what God has given me. 

Sometimes, we play the game even though we know we will lose in the end.

Sometimes, we don't play the game even though we know we will win in the end. 

I'm asking you, which is better? Risks are really hard to take. But when we take it with God, we will not lose. I was like the un-player though I know I will win in the end. I was a no-good, I was afraid to take risks. I was afraid on tripping and stumbling. I was afraid of pain. 

I realized, Jesus endured that pain on the cross, just to redeem us with His precious blood. There are much things that I should be thankful about. Because they are too many, I can't even say everything. 

I want myself to be consumed by the fire devoting to Him. Every single inch of me. It is not because I chose Him, but because He has chosen me to be one of His.

What came my way? It was more of, who came with me to travel the way. 

Joyful and Happy,

Author Unknown :))

TODAY IS TUESDAY

Today is Tuesday and it is raining. Imagine me saying this like a preschooler. I was just moved by how my brother was doing in school. Justin, my youngest brother got a perfect score in spelling today. He was bragging it to my face just now. 

Why am I telling this? I realized something. It is not by intelligence that he perfected the test. It was his determination to keep up with others because he was left behind. 

Imagine if everyone was made perfect. Then there would be no sense of trying to be better. Because you are already perfect. To me, I'm fine with being good. But that is the shallowest thing I have ever believed in. I was assured I was already perfect. I thought I am. Because I felt superior to others. I thought I was better than others. 

Those, I am wrong. Now I know why don't mature in every single aspect that I have. I was ignorant. I was fault seeking. I was selfish. 

It's better to have many flaws. Not to make those flaws un-flawed, but to improve that aspect. It's really a mindful thing for me. Because now I have reconsidered what I have not seen in the past seventeen years of my existence. 

HUMILITY is needed. In order to achieve complete improvement. 

And it is what I need to learn. 

Sincerely,

Author Unknown, :))